~Erik

Except when elections are not neat.  It is wicked how crazy people get.  One of my best friends has been doing nothing but blogging about his hatred for Obama/Biden '08.  I have found joy in poking fun at him for this.  He is turning into an angry conservative before my eyes and the odd part is that, after the fateful day, the boiling taking place, in not only my friend, but a large majority of the population will be lowered to a simmer.  I am not saying we shouldn't be especially focused on the running for the leadership positions in our country right now but I am interested by how extreme people tend to become.  I am only extra crazy because I am tired of hearing how every commercial slamming someone is approved by someone I could care less about anyway.

Politics are difficult for me.  I think, for the most part, the way we go about elections is silly.  For me, I want to see who the person running really is.  I am less willing to vote based on stands made on issues than I am by what leadership & character qualities I see.  That is the rub, though.  It is so muddy and foggy and generic.  It makes it hard to see the real person behind the candidate.  That's me.

I was up at the bum crack of dawn yesterday for the annual Mayor's Prayer Breakfast.  This was my fourth time attending and it is incredibly encouraging every time I attend.  Political leaders from all over Clark County are there, along with clergy (of which I am, apparently), teachers, business leaders and others of this type.  This year was no acception.  Our keynote speaker was Al Egg, chaplain for the Blazers, Beavers & Vikings (PSU).  Everything was excellent.

I mention this is for one reason.  During the breakfast, at one point, the origins of the meeting were talked about.  This was the seventh year this was held in Vancouver.  It was the brain child of one Royce Pollard, mayor of Vancouver, WA (pictured).  His idea was to bring together all of these leaders to pray over the city, county, state and nation.  It was very important to him.  So important that he postponed heart surgery to make sure he attended the first meeting.  I plead ignorance to the work of Mayor Pollard but that spoke volumes to me.  Not simply because he chose to make a stand for God but that he made it a priority and lead by example and said proudly that no matter what people thought or the cost, this was worth having and fighting for.

I sat in the Hilton Ballroom in downtown Vancouver, letting this thought sink in.  I cannot speak for the hearts or views of everyone in the room but this was something that was honoring to God and I felt Him there.  To see all of these political leaders making this a priority and making public its importance.  To see the soldiers that were there, tears in their eyes, as 500 people applauded their courage and sacrifice.  To see members of the community, religious and otherwise, uniting under the breakfast's theme "from tragedy to triumph". To hear Vancouver Police Officer, Rey Reynolds, belt out the National Anthem so passionately that perfection didn't matter.  Pride beat in my heart.  This is leadership, this is real, this is America.

Anyway, I don't know what your feelings are on the election, just make Obama proud.  Oh, I can feel the heat of your eyes, conservative Christians!!  HAHA!!  I won't post on my blog who I am voting for.  Can't stand not knowing who and why?  Send me a message and we'll talk.  Until next time, America!! (wow, that sounded very much like Bob Saget from America's Funniest Home Videos signing off.  Weird.)

I'M ERIK ANDERSON AND I APPROVE THIS MESSAGE.

By the way, feel free to comment on who you are voting for and why.  Hugs!

The Economy.  The very mention of it sends waves of uncertainty and unwanted fear through our souls.  Due to these thoughts, which increasingly crawl into our heads throughout the day, sitting mind-numbingly in our cute lil cubicles, we are forced to constantly wonder if and when our boss will drop the axe on the neck of our job.  Finally, a light shines from heaven!  It is National Boss' Appreciation Day!  You have a chance to impress this manager of yours and keep yourself from being ravaged by the pains of poverty.

So, now that this golden opportunity has presented itself, how does one impress his boss in a memorable way?  Baked goods?  Not bad, plus everyone enjoys.  Funny YouTube link?  NO!!! This will only go to show that you have enough time while at work to surf these videos and while the intention of giggles is good, proving that you are expendable is counterproductive.  What about flowers?  Again, this is appreciate your boss day and not give your boss the wrong impression about your feelings day.  This goes double for you, fellas!

I have another solution.  Impress him with your knowledge.  Not just any knowledge but helpful facts that your boss should know but probably doesn't.  These will help you to sound very knowledgable AND witty.  Quite memorable indeed and a kind thing to do.  You don't want your boss to look foolish do you?  I will list some of these helpful yet juicy tidbits below:

1.) Money isn't made of paper.  It is made out of cotton.

2.) The dot above the letter "I" is called a tittle.  (Important not to giggle here.)

3.) 40% of McDonalds profits come from the sale of Happy Meals.

4.) The 'spot' on 7-UP comes from it's inventor, who had red eyes.  He was an albino.

5.) 315 enteries in Webster's 1996 edition of the dictionary were misspelled.

6.) Ketchup was sold in the 1830's as medicine.

7.) Leonardo Da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time.  Hence, multitasking was born.

Now, you don't want to sound like a stuffed shirt here.  Feel free to drop a few on the more humorous ones in there too:

1.) A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuosly from the bottom of the glass to the top.

2.) Most lipstick contains fish scales.

3.) Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to explode.  (Important for male bosses only.  Also, for a male employee to share this will cause an unspoken bond to occur, ensuring you will be around as long as your boss.  Same for the ladies because if you know something like this, a man will never lose faith in you.  Ever.)

4.) There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.

5.) The mask used by Michael Myers in the original "Halloween" movie was a Captain Kirk mask painted white.

6.) The phrase "Rule of Thumb" is derived from an old English law that stated you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.

7.) Chewing gum while peeling onions will stop you from crying.

8.) (Use at your own discretion) Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a space suit damages it.

Now you have the tools necessary to to leave a lasting impression on that hard nosed boss of yours.  Not only have you enlightened them in a non-threatening way but you have valued them by taking time out to help them be a better person.  Way to go!  Looks like you won't be getting that pink colored check after all.  Good luck, model employee!

So there you have it.  I have blogged on Boss Appreciation Day and offered thoughts on preventing yourself from slipping into a life of poverty.  Wow.  Good blog.  Meat and taters.  Got any thoughts on weird facts, your boss or the tragedy of poverty?  Comments go below.  Your thoughts are encouraged!  Love ya Rick and Chuck (my bosses)!!

~E

Leslie and I have been dating since March of 2007.  For those counting, that is a bit over a year and a half.  She means the world to me.  When I think of a future with her, it feels so dead on.  She challenges me, supports me and loves me, even though there have been many times I have deserved less.  Life with her looks way too good.  I haven't been this excited in a long time!

So, deciding she would be my love until the day I die, dinner seemed appropriate.  I had quite a plan in mind... which means that something went wrong because with plans like that, they just do.  For the special evening, I envisioned a scene straight out of Generic Romantic Movie that would make her feel like her prince had just slayed a dragon and scaled a castle tower to save her.  I had the ring, the sweaty palms and the gumption.  Here was the evening...

It was about 4pm last Saturday.  A bit later than I was hoping but other errands had kicked my booty.  I knew she was done working at 6pm.  More than enough time.  For the past few weeks, I had been drooling over crab.  I thought that would make a perfect engagement dinner!  However, when I saw them at Winco earlier in the week, I chose not to get them.  Not only was she with me but crab sitting in the fridge is kind of a dead giveaway.  So I was patient.  I strolled into the store on Saturday to get these pink beauties. 

Note to all future Romeos - If you want fresh seafood, don't wait until the end of the week to buy it.  Yes, you guessed it.  Sold clean out.  I know, right?  After a small convulsion of worry I calmed myself down with "No worries!  Safeway is right down the road.  Surely they will have the crab I seek!"  I politely sped to Safeway.  Rounded the store and yes, you guessed right again, no crab.  Crap.  It's okay Erik... Costco is right down the road.  I repeated the last few steps.  Arrived at the surplus capital of Clark County.  Yes, you guessed it, no crab. Okay, okay. Caaaaaaaaaaalm down, Mr. Anderson.

Light shined from above, it seemed.  This happened to be the weekend that Costco had their fresh seafood stand out.  I glanced around and found perfection after a short search: two lobster tails.  HALLELUJAH!!!  Thankfully, the gentleman tending the stand was knowledgable about how to cook these golden treasures.  Sure!  Got a steamer?  That was his reply.  No.  Alright then.  I was to cut them down the middle (easier said than done, thank you) and place them on the grill that I did have.  Said they wouldn't take long and to check their underbellies where I had cut them.  If they were soft, more grillin'.  Firm, they are done.  Got it.

I was again speeding politely to get back to the apartment in time. 4:50pm.  Yipe!  Still had to add cleaning to the list.  See, this little lady of mine is the kind that can't relax if there is mess about.  It adds to the romance, people!  Got there, ran up, let dog out of the bathroom/holding room, fed and pottied (puppies first, my friends) and whipped out the tails.  I took some scissors to their underneath (calm down, PETA) and added them to the grill.  Grill lit with little struggle and I was off.

Fast forward to the blessed event (I realize some of you have jobs to get back to.  I appreciate the support).  She arrived at the very clean appartment, already suspecting I was planning something.  Got comfortable in the candlelit living area with a glass of wine picked out by yours truly.  I made her close her eyes and upon opening them, her eyes drank in the beautifully prepared meal including buttered pasta, sauteed green beans and the perfectly cooked lobster tails on a bed of green leaf lettuce and cherry tomatoes.  No one had ever made lobster tails for her before.  Dipping her first bite in the melted garlic butter I had created, she said it was delicious.  After dining, we sat on the couch and I brought the ring box out of my pocket and awkwardly asked the question under the atmosphere of dimmed light driven by candles and soft smooth jazz.  Yes.

She would later tell me she was just as excited about the clean apartment as the lobster.  I still laugh a little to myself.  That's Les.  I am looking forward to our days together, with everything I am. Thank you for her, Papa.

Well, one can't keep a rotten bag o' taters, so I took them back to Unnamed Store (protecting their identity, don't want you to judge).  There, I stood in an UNBELIEVABLEY long customer service line.  Once the less than friendly customer service agent sent me out to get new spuds, I ran across I lady I used to work with!  And the awkward meeting got underway.

Once you pass the 25 year mark in your life, as I have, you now have enough history behind you to eventually run across a person whom you knew in a proverbial "past life".  I new this wonderful lady of Indian decent (India Indian, not Native American Indian) from my previous job at Unnamed Retirement Community.  She was a cook there and we worked together for a couple of years.  I spotted her, she spotted me.  We immediately recognized each other and gave a cordial side hug to each other and asked how each other was.  After a brief exchange, we parted ways in a friendly manner and I went about my search for a bag new red starch balls.

Why do I relate this story to you, you ask?  Well, one detail I left out of the meeting was that I could not, for the life of me, remember her name!  I experienced what is commonly known as "Tip-Of-The-Tongue" Syndrome.  I could just about taste the name but couldn't recall it for a million dollars (which with this economy won't get you very far but that is a blog for another day, which will never see the light of day).  Anyhighwho, there I was, drawing a blank.  I am not sure but I did find solace in the theory that she couldn't remember my name either.  Neither of our names was brought up in the conversation.  I am, however, still toiling over this mystery.  IT'S SO CLOSE, I TELLS YA!!!

Now, this wasn't the most awkward of situations like this.  I know I have been asked before by people if I remember them and their name and I don't or I introduce myself to people more than once.  I just wanted to share with you my awkward pain.  Feel free to share a story of your own where this happened.  Don't be afraid, I don't judge.  I love.  That's all.

And for those still wondering, I was able to replace my sack of red Idaho's best.  Thank you for the notes of concern.  Comment time! 

Brief History of Why I'm Asking - I am finding myself enjoying, anticipating and even going out of my way to record shows that one might think don't have a large Dude following.  I believe this is due mostly in fact to my girl, who is insistent that anything I like to watch is stupid.  Here are a few of the examples of what I am talking about.  Judge if you need, my deep likes of these will remain intact.

1.) Nanny 911

The premise of this first show is families that have especially rambunkshish children call the supposed ex-nanny of the Royal Family in England (apparently this says a lot about the Royal Family's behavioral issues).  She shows a well put together video montage of misbehavior to her crackpot team of nannys, discusses the video with them and then picks one with the she thinks would be best for the job of helping the family not, um, suck so much.  The selected nanny, whether Nanny Deb, Nanny Stella or Nanny Yvonne (named from memory, mind you) travels to the family's home and spends a week with them.  Basically they always tell them they are crappy parents (which is generally true), give them better skills (common sense, usually) and lays out some much needed boundaries for the kids.  Love this.  A Dude show?  Scale from 1 - 10, 1 being chick flickish and 10 being Man-arific

2.) Jon & Kate plus 8

This wonderful show follows the lives of Jon & Kate Gosselin and their 8 kids.  The story (Reader's Digest version) goes that Jon & Kate, after haveing their first set of multiples, their twins Cara and Madelyn, they thought they would try for one more child and ended up with sextuplets.  I know.  Holy cow.  I tell you though, once you begin watching this show, you can not help but fall in love with this amazing family.  I don't want that many kids.  It is amazing to watch this close knit family and see really what family is all about.  I almost feel like I am a part of their family even though joining in the fun from my living room doesn't constitute an invitation for Thanksgiving Dinner.  A Dude Show?

3.) How To Look Good Naked

I realize this may sound kind of odd right off hand.  Bear with me.  Basically, if you are not familiar with the show or made a snap judgement when you read the title, I will explain.  The show is hosted by Carson Kressley, ex-co-host of Queer Eye For The Straight Guy.  The premise of the show is, as Kressley puts it in the introduction, to begin a preception revolution.  He helps women with a poor self image and self esteem and helps them to realize that they are beautiful exactly like they are.  The point being that beauty goes beyond a size zero.  He helps them to love themselves for who they are and that they don't have to live with a false belief that they are flawed.  I think this is just about one of the most counter culteral shows around simply because, for the most part, media tells us what beauty is and should be and if you don't measure up, then you aren't worth a single thing.  I love what this show does for people and I just about cry everytime.  What if we all truly believed that what we are is perfect and we don't need to conform to a preconcieved notion of perfection.  Incredible. A Dude Show?

Well, let me know what you think.  Feel free to rate them on my Dude Scale.  Also, if there is a show that I missed, let me know.  Dudes, we are missing some good shtuff.  Talk with y'all again soon!

~Erik

So, if you read my last blog, I told you my plans got interrupted by a video that I felt was necessary to share with the world.  That accomplished, I still feel like I want to blog a little about Living Free about a week and a half ago.  We had a special screening of "Crystal Darkness".  It is a documentary about Methamphetamine and the effects of its use in our culture.  It is a very powerful and very raw look at something causes destruction in an individual life so quickly that it would give you whiplash.  It shares the stories of 10+ people whose lives will never be the same because of their abuse of this substance.

This is the type of drug that can't even be used recreationally due to it's addictive properties.  It is instantanious not experimental.  I wanted our people at Living Free to see it for two reasons: One, to make them aware of something that is reaching epidemic status in our home town and two, to see, once again, that even though the vehicle may be different, Satan attacks us the same seeking the same result.  That result is isolation from God and each other.  What we hope will fill a void will only create more distanceand make the hole we all have inside even bigger.  My heart breaks because of the destruction it causes in not only individuals but in the people they love.

I received a poem.  I actually got the same poem from two different people (Thanks Erin & Paula).  I am going to warn you now.  It is raw and real but it reflects the feelings, thoughts and beliefs of someone who was owned by Meth.  She's a young Indian girl and she wrote this while in jail for drug charges; she was addicted to Meth.  As you will read shortly, she fully grasped the horrors of this drug and she tells about it in this simple and yet profound poem.  Take a look --

My name is Meth...

I destroy homes, I tear families apart

I take your children and that's just the start

I am more costly than diamonds, more precious than gold

The sorrow I bring is a sight to behold

If you need me, remember I am easily found

I live around you - in schools and in town

I live with the rich, I live with the poor

I live down the street and maybe next door

I'm made in a lab but not like you think

I can be made under the kitchen sink

In your child's closet and even in the woods

If this scares you to death, well it certainly should

I have many names but there's one yo know best

I'm sure you've heard of me, my name is "crystal meth'

My power is awesome; try me you'll see

But if you do, you may never break free

Just try me once and I might let you go

But try me twice and I'll own your soul

When I posess you, you'll steal and you'll lie

You do what you have to -- just to get high

The crimes you'll commit for my narcotic charms

Will be worth the pleasure you'll feel in your arms

(your lungs and your nose)

You'll lie to your mother; you'll steal from your dad

When you see their tears, you should feel sad

But you'll forget your morals and how you were raised

I'll be your conscience, I'll teach you my ways

I take kids from parents and parents from kids

I turn people from God and separate friends

I'll take everything from you, your looks and your pride

I'll be with you -- always -- right by your side

You'll give up everything - your family, your home

Your friends, your money, then you'll be alone

I'll take and take, till you have nothing more to give

When I'm finished with you, you'll be lucky to live

If you try me, be warned - this is no game

If given the chance, I'll drive you insane

I'll ravish your body, I'll control your mind

I'll own you completely, your sould will be mine

The nightmares I'll give you while lying in bed

The voices you'll hear, from inside your head

The sweats, the shakes, the visions you'll see

I want you to know, these are all 'gifts' from me

But then it's too late and you'll know in your heart

That you are mine and we shall not part

You'll regret that you tried me, they always do

But you came to me, not I to you

You knew this would happen, many times you were told

But you challenged my power and chose to be bold

You could have said no and just walked away

If you could live that day over, now what would you say?

I'll be your master, you'll be my slave

I'll even go with you when you go to your grave

Now that you've met me, what will you do?

Will you try me or not? It's all up to you

I can bring you more misery than words can tell

Come take my hand, let me lead you to HELL!

We all battle against something.  We all will fight during our lives.  It all comes to a decision.  God calling you one way, the enemy the other.  She was released from jail but, true to her story, the drug owned her.  They found her dead not long after, with the needle still in her arm.  Choose life.  God will always be waiting for you.  If you need help, we are here for you.  This is a fight we are all in, in one form or another.  It may not be Meth but can manifest in other addictions, depression, anger... even grief.  Let's fight together.  Live together, die alone.  Victory and life can be gained.  It's scary but I have seen God do too many things in so many people's lives that I have no choice but to believe.  I hope you will join in the fight with me!

~Erik

I found this video on Jason Boyett's Blog and I had to share it with you all.  To quote Jason: "Sometimes there are videos that require long introductions telling you why it's important that you watch. But sometimes there are videos that are perfectly self-justifying, and need no introduction or qualification due to their inherent awesomeness. This is one of those videos."

ZAP!!!

See, I'm not a huge fan of weddings.  Attending them anyway.  After awhile, it seems like once you have seen a couple of weddings, you have seen them all.  Sure, there are some variations: different song selection, party colors, ceremony elements, reception options.  Generally though, I can basically lay out the event and it's content.  I'm always very excited for the couple and the immediate family but I rarely want to actually attend the ceremony itself.  This may sound selfish, but weddings just don't interest me much.  I realize it isn't about me and that it is in celebration of the commitment two people are making.  I also take marriage very seriously.  I am just not the dressy-upy, sweat to the oldies dancing, mint eating guy.  I can only do the Chicken Dance so many times.  I have limits.

All that being said, and referring back to the title of this blog, I think funerals are different story.  Yes, I realize that there is a similarity in the structures of all memorial services as well.  I get that.  However, funerals offer something that weddings rarely do.  I will usually choose funerals to weddings because funerals show you a picture of a person's life.

At memorial services, you have the opportunity to hear the impact one life has made.  You hear what I would describe as the person's greatest hits.  People share stories that make you laugh, make you cry and make you think.  They remind you of your own mortality and that you only have one life.  One life to invest yourself in others.  One life to make someone smile.  One life to do something they will remember you for.

Yes, funerals are sad.  Weddings are happy and joyous celebrations.  But I submit this to you: funerals are celebrations as well.  Celebrations of a life well lived.  I haven't been to a funeral yet where I don't hear the best highlights of a person's life.  It isn't about what you have or had but the people you were with and the memories you made.  Relationships are truly what matter most.  Next time you are at a service like this, seek the beauty of life.  I garuantee you will see something beautiful.  As beautiful as a wife on her wedding day.

Same with life.  Hard but when you stop and actually look at the beauty of it, it blows you away.  I am far from perfect, as is my life.  But when I truly stop and stare, I can do nothing but thank my creator and soul lover.

This makes me really ponder my future though.  I feel like I am stuck.  Not like stuck in ice or mud but almost like a I have a split in the trail.  I need to move and choose a path.  Here's my deal - I am a firm believer that God will give you opportunities but, for the most part, won't come down in a miraculous display and say, "MY SON.  THIS IS THE CORRECT PATH FOR YOUR LIFE."  I believe, for me, that God wants me to experience life to its fullest and trust Him to be with me wherever I go.  I also know that God will give me opportunities based on my giftings and how he has wired me.  I think so many times these opportunities come and we are simply afraid of failing or making a wrong move.  But really, our potential is only limited by what we are willing to risk. 

It is really scary to change.  To have to choose the path to the right or to the left. However, sticking with my previous analogy, I know that whichever way I choose, I know two things.  It won't be easy but the pay off will be breathtaking.  God will always make beauty from the mess of my life.  As long as he is with me on the hike, the trip will be more than I could ever have hoped for.

Pray for me.  I'm afraid.  Pray my brain will make it to my heart.  I love you all!